Sleeping with the fan on

A. Sometimes I take for granted common knowledge in Korea. Ajumma means, literally, "woman old enough to be married." Ajoshi means "man old enough to be married." It's more that that, though. Ajumma is a state of mind. When women cut their hair and curl it and start pushing and shoving a lot like a wild beast on the subway ... they are an ajumma. When a woman starts wearing a visor of a color and size that would give Darth Vader helmet envy ... they are an ajumma. When a woman gets together with her friends and talks so loud that the decibel level of their conversation rivals that of an above-ground nuclear test ... they are an ajumma.

Ajoshi are more laid back about their status. Actually, ajoshi isn't a terrible label. Ajoshi are usually pretty decent people that get together with their friends and get tanked after working a 14 hour day. They don't have time to be obnoxious.

Ajumma are quickly becoming my main source of stress in Korea. They walk three across on a street and don't move to let you pass. They push your ass out of the way to get to a seat on the subway. They get in the elevator and push "door close" so that they don't have to ride the elevator with you. They're the mothers that put their kid in YOUR class to learn English from YOU, but try to tell you how to teach.